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How to Create a Safety Plan for Leaving an Abusive Relationship

A brief guide to protecting yourself with a free downloadable safety planning guide


If you're reading this, you may be in a situation that doesn't feel safe.

Or maybe someone you love is.


First, I need you to know something:


You are not alone.

What's happening is not your fault.

And you deserve to be safe.


Leaving an abusive relationship is one of the most courageous decisions a person can make. It's also one of the most dangerous. Research shows that the risk of harm often increases when someone is leaving or when the abuser believes they're about to leave.

This isn't meant to scare you into staying. It's meant to help you understand why planning matters.


You don't just walk out the door. You plan. You prepare. You protect yourself.


A safety plan is a personalised, practical guide for keeping yourself safe before, during, and after leaving. It's not about having everything perfect. It's about having options when you need them.



What a Safety Plan Includes

A comprehensive safety plan covers:

  • Your support network — identifying trusted people who can help, and creating code words that signal you need assistance

  • Important documents — gathering identification, financial records, medical information, and evidence of abuse

  • Financial preparation — opening accounts your abuser doesn't know about, saving what you can, knowing that help exists even if you have nothing

  • Your exit strategy — choosing when to leave, where to go, how to get there, and what to do about children and pets

  • An emergency bag — packing essentials you can grab quickly when the time comes

  • Digital safety — protecting yourself from tracking, monitoring, and online surveillance

  • Legal options — understanding protection orders, custody considerations, and documentation

  • Life after leaving — staying safe once you're out, handling contact attempts, and beginning to heal



Why Planning Matters

Abusers often escalate when they feel they're losing control. A safety plan helps you:

  • Leave at a time that's safer for you

  • Have resources ready when you need them

  • Know where you're going and how to get there

  • Protect yourself and your children

  • Avoid common mistakes that could put you at risk

  • Feel more confident when the time comes

You may not leave today. You may not leave next month. But having a plan means you're ready when you are.



Download Your Free Safety Planning Guide

I've created a detailed guide that walks you through every step of creating a safety plan.

It includes:

  • Step-by-step instructions for each phase of planning

  • A checklist of documents and items to gather

  • Guidance for special situations (immigration, faith communities, disabled survivors)

  • Resources and helplines for Canada, the US, the UK, and internationally

  • A quick-reference emergency checklist you can print


A Detailed Safety Plan for Escaping Abuse

Save it somewhere safe. Read it when you can. Share it with someone who might need it.




A Word About Safety

If you're reading this on a device your abuser has access to, please be careful.

  • Use a private or incognito browser window

  • Clear your browsing history after reading

  • Consider accessing this information from a safer device: a library computer, a friend's phone, or a work computer

Your safety includes digital safety, too.


If You Need Help Now

  • Canada: Assaulted Women's Helpline — 1-866-863-0511 (24/7)

  • United States: National Domestic Violence Hotline — 1-800-799-7233 (24/7) or text "START" to 88788

  • United Kingdom: National Domestic Abuse Helpline — 0808 2000 247 (24/7)

  • International: HotPeachPages.net — global directory of domestic violence resources

  • Free 2 Rest Blog - Where to Find Help: Global & Online Platforms Offering Real Mental Health Support


You Deserve Safety

Whether you leave today, next month, or next year, know that this information is yours.

You are not responsible for the abuse. You cannot fix your abuser. You deserve peace. You deserve freedom. You deserve a life without fear.

And when you're ready, there is a way out.


Together, we are Free to Rest.



Related Resources:

If this resource helped you, please share it. You never know who needs it.


 
 
 

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